Where do I go from here

Yup another birthday has come and gone. I am now 38 and still f%&*ing fat. I am frustrated with myself. I have been off my meds for almost 6 weeks now due to stomach complaints. And I am not seeing my shrink until the 7th of June. I refuse to go to a local doctor to talk about it due to my insane need for my privacy. Ironic since I post this out there on the net. I am battling daily with my brain but it is certainly not as bad as it once was. In the last two months the thought to end my life has only crossed my brain once. Impressive in my mind since I have been off my meds that being said the comfort eating has gone through the freaking roof. Yuppers I am climbing close to the 244 mark again. This upsets me greatly. 

So what the heck do I do and where do I go from here?

Well the treadmill that was broken has been replaced but has not yet been reassembled. So perhaps I should get off my fat arse and fix it eh?

That would be step one.

Step two is to make a freaking plan and work that damn ass plan.

I am not sure if I ever mentioned but I have booked myself to walk a marathon in October.....

Yup talk about biting off more than I can chew. I booked this in October of 2010 and was doing really well with my training and then life got in the way....

school got hard

got a boyfriend

bought a house and well....the excuses continue onwards....

And that is just that they are excuses and they are not acceptable

Therefore 

I need to work my plan and plan my work.

Starting with blogging it and doing it...

Lets see how well I do....drum roll please.